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January 19, 2023
3 Tips On Cancelling Plans And Making Space For Yourself

Faith Villanueva

A woman smiles while relaxing by herself on a couch in her home and talks on the phone with her dog beside her.

Cancelling Or Rescheduling Plans To Protect Your Peace

We all have times when we don’t have the energy to get out and socialize. You may face social anxiety, be an introverted person, or you may have simply drained your social battery. 

To protect your own peace, you may have to cancel plans at the last minute. This can be difficult to do, especially if you struggle with people-pleasing. Here are three tips to make cancelling or rescheduling plans as smooth as possible.

  1. Acknowledge your needs

Even when our mind or body needs a break, we may dismiss or invalidate our desire to be alone. Maybe you fear that your loved one will take the cancellation negatively or become concerned about their relationship with you. 

It takes practice to recognize and accept when you need to make space for yourself. You may feel difficult or awkward asserting this need, but when you act on this, you’re showing self-compassion.

  1. Acknowledge their feelings

Even if you’re doing what’s best for yourself, your decision to cancel plans could disappoint or confuse the other person. Acknowledge their feelings: they’re allowed to feel this way, just as you’re allowed to change your mind about plans. 

Asserting your needs and cancelling plans may cause uncomfortable conversations. But it can also show your loved one that if they’re ever in the same situation, you’ll understand their needs.

  1. Set boundaries for your well-being

Learning to set and stick to your boundaries helps you protect your peace. Consider the type of plans you anticipate and the type you dread. Some people are energized in group settings, while others find it exhausting and demanding. Both are okay!

Do you prefer the intimacy of one-on-one dinners or the flowing conversation of a house party? Do you like people visiting you in your space, or would you rather meet in public? Understanding your preferences and limitations can help you make plans that fall within your capacity.

Your well-being matters

When you cancel or reschedule plans, you’re setting a boundary. It might bring feelings of shame, guilt, or embarrassment, especially if you cancel for reasons other than physical illness or a family emergency. But remember, protecting your mental health is just as important as any other reason to reschedule plans. 

For more tips on how to support your well-being, join one of our upcoming free webinars! Each is led by our experienced therapists, with topics like Finding your Emotional Balance, Journalling for Mental Health, and much more! 

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